Are you ready? You do realize that Dec 21 is right around the corner, right?
I already have my clothes laid out and I called ahead to IHop to have plenty of pancakes ready. As the Zombies rule the world, I’m planning on playing Madden 13 with Jesus… and eat pancakes of course.
If you’ve been paying attention to books, movies and tv shows over the past few years, you’ll see that zombies are popping up with alarming frequency–and instead of just considering them entertainment, we should look at them as a warning.
Dude, don’t laugh. I’m serious. Zombies…. Zombies!
To run from Zombies, but yet be strong enough to fight them off, you’ll need the perfect blend of workouts that not only get you stronger, but also make you leaner.
It’s the best of BOTH worlds. It’s like CrossFit meets Roman.
You see, my buddy Roman (he loves it when I call him Mark Sanchez) has a program designed to help you. Yes, that’s right–he’s got a program specifically designed to get you in the kind of shape you’ll need to be in to survive.
“LOLZ… Ohhh Romanz, there’z no Zombieeezzzz”
In fact, it’s even called The Zombie Apocalypse Survival Workout, and as Roman says, it’s the ONLY workout designed to help you slay the undead, protect your family, and make it through the end of the world.
And you DO want to protect your family and survive the end of the world, don’t you? You’ll join me and play Madden as we watch Zombies walk by. Zombies HATE pancakes.
But to eat pancakes, you have to use powerful workouts that burn off the pancakes… and fight off Zombies, too.
You’ll need to be strong enough to combat Zombies, yet lean enough to look cool doing it.
And that’s what the Zombie Apocalypse Survival Workout will do for you. It’s a multi-dimensional approach to fitness, a 12 week program that is designed to make you capable of ANYTHING.
During this extreme program, you’ll:
- build strength and muscle
- build speed
- develop insane endurance and work capacity.
- get leaner
- build resistance to injuries
- even jump higher and swing harder
In other words, you’ll improve EVERY aspect of fitness.
If you’re familiar with the idea of “crossfit”, then you have a basic understanding of what the Zombie Apocalypse Survival Workout is all about. It’s not a program that will develop pure strength or designed purely for fat loss or purely for endurance–you’ll get enough of each of these to be extremely good all of them, just not enough to master any one of them.
Which is EXACTLY what you need to survive Zombies…and life in general, whether the world has ended or not.
Look, being strong is awesome, and for strength very few things beat powerlifting…but I think we can agree that as controversial as crossfit is, the average crossfitter is going to survive a lot longer than the average power lifter when the world ends.
When the zombies come, it won’t be enough to “just” be strong or “just” be lean or “just” have good endurance–you’ll need all of them at once. The same goes for life as it is now…unless you’re competing in something, you don’t need to be amazing at anything, and so a program like ZAW is amazing for general fitness, as well.
So, whether you’re trying to prepare for the end of the world, or just for life in this one, the Zombie Apocalypse is a program you should have in your arsenal.
And in 4 days, as I sit down in IHop and watch Zombies go by, those silly Mayans have predicted that Roman’s sale on his ZAW program will also end…
… and you’ll be left out.
I’ll see you at IHop on Friday,… bring your playstation controller…